A Lump of Coal from YAL

Another reason not to join the dishonest, treason-loving frauds at “Young Americans for Liberty” (a name so wrong, it should never be reprinted without quotation marks): they really suck at writing poetry. On Christmas Day, Bonnie Kristian posted YAL’s own version of “The Night Before Christmas,” and…well, it’s special. A sample:

“YAL members are young, and they are eager too.
”They know what they believe and they don’t like you.
“With strong donor support and the winds at their backs,
“I can assure you, they’re planning attack.”

“This Fall they were training; they’re incredibly smart.
“They’ve turned liberty activism into a science and art.
“Many volunteered for campaigns to express their strong voices.
“And came Election Day, the results reflected their choices.”

“The TEA Party is real; don’t you know what this means?
“Say goodbye and good riddance to your printing machines.
“Ron Paul has a new job – and, oh, I’m sure you will care,
“He’s the new Domestic Monetary Policy chair.”

Bernanke’s jaw quivered, and fear filled his eyes.
He knew I was serious, that we had uncovered his lies.
And just then he noticed the snow was starting to stick,
His paper sleigh was melting; this was the end of his shtick.

The awkward flow and the hit-&-miss rhyming are amusing enough, but the self-congratulation and the Ron-Paul-as-savior nonsense – neither of which has been earned, by the way – make this a true classic of self-parody.

Leave a comment